WrestleMania Predictions!

As a guy who hasn’t watched a full episode of Raw in over a year, and whose only full PPVs since last year’s WrestleMania have been Fast Lane and the Royal Rumble, I feel like the perfectly qualified person to predict all this year’s winners.

Come to think of it, I missed WrestleMania 30 as well…

Battle Royal: Ryback

Why not, I have no interest in this or how anyone got there or what happens or watching it. Ryback seemed to be gaining popularity last time I watched with the whole Survivor Series thing, so let’s go for him.

IC Ladder Match: Daniel Bryan

Best guess is Bryan to keep people happy, since the entire world has decided he should replace Cena as the guy who wins everything. Until they get sick of him winning presumably. My second favourite is Ambrose, then Ziggler, for the same reasons.

Fatal 4-Way Tag Titles: Kidd & Cesaro

Just a feeling the current champions will win. I’m assuming it’s not one of those daft Fatal 4-Way matches where only two people are allowed in the ring at once and anyone can tag in anyone, I think that rule is stupid.

US Title John Cena v Rusev: Cena

Can’t wait to see Cena with the US Title. It’s going to make such a nice change, it will open up a bunch of new feuds for Cena, and it will make the title look good again. Having Cena and Bryan as the US and IC champs would be awesome.

Undertaker v Bray Wyatt: Wyatt

Wyatt needs to win this. Ideally it would have been with the streak on the line, but I’ve seen him calling out The Undertaker the last few weeks and he is just something else. Shame I couldn’t find a tshirt for Sunday.

AJ Lee & Paige v Bella Twins: AJ & Paige

AJ and Paige (mainly Paige) are just the best/only good women not on NXT at the minute and should have this easy. Seriously though if you haven’t watched the women on NXT go do it, they’re so much better than the crap on WWE TV.

Randy Orton v Seth Rollins: Orton

Rollins doesn’t need this, he’s got his Money in the Bank and whatnot. Orton’s whole pretending to be back with The Authority and betraying them was played out horrendously. From what I saw anyway, I waited ages for him to come back and found it so disappointing. Should be an amazing match though.

Sting v Triple H: Sting

Got to assume Sting will win his first ever WWE match, it would make no sense for him to lose unless they had no other plans for him after this. It’s gonna be way better than a Sting v Taker match mind.

Roman Reigns v Brock Lesnar: Reigns

I kinda hoped that this match wouldn’t be so soon because I really wanted to see another year or so of Lesnar butching the whole locker room. The time probably should be now for Reigns though, unless he’s still getting booed out of buildings in which case losing might actually help him get some sympathy. Either that or getting cashed in on right after he wins and gets F-5ed through a table or something.

There we are, at some point on Monday or more likely Tuesday I’ll look back at this and presumably laugh at how hideously wrong I was about every match. Also, yes I know it’s pre-planned but people write this kind of thing about TV shows all the time. I’m pretty sure there’s like a full book series of Game of Thrones predictions.

So with that wonderful bad humour done, onwards to Sunday night! Well first work, then a party, then Sunday day time. But after that, Sunday night! I’m also predicting the best match will be Orton v Rollins, and the most epic moment will be during Wyatt v Taker.

Have a nice day, bang bang! – Cactus Jack


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About Darren Hyland

If I don't see you, good afternoon good evening and goodnight! Check the About Darren page for a bit more on me.

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